Blast From the Past
by Ranguvar27
Summary: While at the store, Rubin runs into the last person he expects to see-Ed Tuttle, and invites him home to meet the new woman in his life-Danni.


A Blast from the Past

There was a shaft of sunlight shining through the slats of the blinds, landing with perverse preciseness on Danni's eyelid, and she groaned and threw her hands over her face, but it was too late. She groaned again and opened her eyes, blinking away the sleep, and then turned to look at her still sleeping husband. She stared at him for several moments, just loving him, and then poked him hard in the chest. "Rubin. Rubin. Rubin."

A low moan of exasperation came from him. "What, Danielle?"

Danni giggled. "Wake up."

A long suffering sigh, and he spoke with his eyes still shut tight. "Why?"

Danni thought for a few moments, and then spoke in a blasé voice. "Because I'm naked?"

"We made love last night, of course you're naked. Try again."

Danni sighed theatrically, and then stroked his chest. "Well, I was going to take a nice, long, hot and steamy shower. I thought about asking you to join me, but that's okay. You keep sleeping, and I'll be all by myself in the shower, the water running down my breasts and stomach, making me all hot and slick for…well, no point in dwelling on things. Have a good sleep." She climbed out of bed and walked to the bathroom, stepping into the shower as soon as it was hot enough. "Five, four, three, two…" the bathroom door banged open and Rubin crossed it in a leap, yanking the shower door open and slamming her hard against the wall. "One. So glad you could join me." Further attempt at speech was stopped when Rubin claimed her mouth, kissing her hungrily as he pressed his long fingers against her sex, stroking with single minded determination. Danni growled, moving against him and muttering encouragement. He released her, and then slid down, and Danni gasped as his tongue replaced his fingers. "Oooh…baby you are so good at this."

Rubin chuckled, flicking his tongue across her clit. "Practice makes perfect."

"You…uhhh…like practicing, don't you?"

"Mmm hmm. Now, be a good girl and try not to shake too much."

Danni blinked in confusion and was about to ask him what he meant when she felt his lips close hard around her clit and his tongue plunge deep inside her. She screamed in pleasure, her head whipping back and forth and her body trembling as she came over and over. Rubin dug his hands into her thighs, stilling her a bit.

After a few moments where Danni made sure she wasn't going to collapse, she sighed deeply in satisfaction and ran her fingers through Rubin's hair. "Wow."

Rubin grinned up at her. "You're welcome." She rolled her eyes and smacked his shoulder, and he grinned wider.

Twenty minutes later, they exited the shower, dried off and dressed. Rubin went to the fridge, opening it, and stared into the depths for several moments. "Danni?"

Danni looked up from scratching Emma's ears. "Yeah?"

Rubin turned to her, a mournful look on his face. "There's no eggs. I was going to make omelets."

"Keys are in the bowl, and there's twenty dollars in the house jar. The store should be open."

Rubin opened up the blue cookie jar that held their 'emergency money' for gas and trips to the store and pulled out five dollars, then fished the car keys out of their bowl and headed out, calling "I'll be back in a few minutes" over his shoulder. Danni nodded and waved.

Rubin pulled the car into a spot close by the store's entrance, noting that the parking lot was nearly empty this early. Fortunately, the store was open, and he stepped into the air conditioned interior with relief. The Galant-which Danni's parents had given her a few months ago as a combo birthday/anniversary present-had an air conditioner that only seemed to work every once in a while, and Danni had been pestering Rubin to take it into the shop for repair. And he was going to.

Eventually.

He sighed and was heading for the dairy aisle when he heard a voice that sounded eerily familiar. 'No way, it couldn't be him!' But five minutes later, an angry shout broke the silence.

"You dumb shit! You are the most ignorant, imbecilic idiot to ever work in cashier service! You dumb son of a bitch!"

Rubin groaned and passed his hand across his face, hoping against hope that he would be able to buy his eggs and leave before he was spotted. But Fate had other plans. He turned the corner and ran smack dab into the last person he ever expected or wanted to see.

Ed staggered back into a magazine display, jarring it, and a 'Time' fell to the floor. "Why don't you watch where you're going, you ig…." He trailed off as he got a good look at the person that had plowed into him. "Rubin? !"

Rubin plastered a false smile on his face. "Ed. What a….surprise. What are you doing here?"

Ed grinned. "Well, the Organization sent me out here."

Rubin scoffed and placed his eggs on the conveyer. "You're still with those idiots? I thought you swore them off."

Ed sighed. "Yeah, I did, but a few months ago Mr. Buttes called and said he was willing to give me another chance."

Rubin rolled his eyes. "Uh huh. Find anyone to go to that ego stroking seminar yet?"

Ed brightened, smiling what Rubin had silently termed his 'Salesman's Grin'. "Well, that's a big reason why I'm here. I was heading there, and needed some refreshments. I never expected to run into you here!"

"I live here."

Ed grinned wider. "No kidding! Your mom finally leave the hotel?"

Rubin grinned. "Nope." He headed out to the car, Ed following. Rubin placed the eggs in the backseat, and then had to stifle a wicked laugh. "Ed, why don't you come over for breakfast? We'd love to have you."

"Who's we?"

Rubin bit back a grin and tried to speak seriously. "Danielle and I. I've told her about you, and I think she'd like to meet you."

Ed was even more confused. "Who's Danielle?"

Rubin grinned. "Come over for breakfast and I'll introduce you."

Ed shrugged. "Why not? I could use a decent meal for once." Rubin gave him the address. "I'll be there in ten minutes."

Danni looked up from the paper as Rubin tossed the keys into the bowl, walked over to the couch and flopped into it, laughing. "Rubin, what is going on?"

"You won't believe who I ran into at the store. Ed Tuttle." Danni gaped at him, and he giggled. "I'm telling the truth. The guy hasn't changed. I invited him over for breakfast."

Danni grinned. "That's great! I'd love to meet him." Rubin grinned and kissed her.

"I thought you might. I need to get the omelets assembled. He should be here soon." At that moment, there was a knock at the door, and Rubin grinned. "Right on time. Why don't you get the door, babe? I've got breakfast to cook." He dodged the swipe she aimed at him and went into the kitchen.

Danni sighed and went to answer the door. "You must be Ed. Rubin's told me all about you. I must say, I'm finally glad to meet you. I'm Danielle. You can call me Danni."

Ed gaped at her, and Danni's eyes darkened in annoyance when he stared at her breasts and legs. It was her own damn fault for wearing cutoffs and one of Rubin's shirts, she thought. "If you're quite done ogling me, do come in." Ed colored in embarrassment and nodded, and Danni stepped aside.

Ed stood in the middle of the living room, twisting his hands nervously and trying to think of something to say. "Lovely place." He looked over at Danni, his eyes crawling across her rather generous front, and she glared daggers at him. He shifted his gaze, looking around. "So, how do you know Rubin?"

Rubin grinned. "She and I are related by marriage." Danni snorted in laughter. "What? It's true, isn't it?"

Danni giggled and picked up Emma, who was rubbing against her leg and purring. "Yes, it's true." She looked over at Ed, who had a rather befuddled look on his face. "Ed, why don't you sit down? Breakfast should be soon, Rubin makes great omelets."

Ed sat on the couch, and Danni took the chair across from him, stroking Emma. Ed cleared his throat. "So, uhhh…Danni, how exactly are you and Rubin related? Are you his cousin or something?"

Danni giggled. "Yes, or something. I'll give you three guesses."

Ed pondered for a moment. "Sister in law?" Danni giggled and shook her head. "Second cousin?" Another shake, and Danni giggled louder. Ed frowned. "Well, than what?" Danni giggled and held up her left hand, her ring visible, and Ed sighed. "That's a lovely ring, but why show it to…is that a wedding ring? !"

Danni nodded. "Sure is. Rubin's got one like it, except his is silver instead of gold." She laughed at the gobsmacked expression on Ed's face. "Well, he did say we were related by marriage."

Ed worked his jaw in stunned silence, finally managing to croak out a single word. "How?"

Rubin flipped the omelet, grinning. "How what, Ed? How did we meet? How do Pop Tarts work?" Ed nodded slowly, and Rubin shrugged. "I've no idea how Pop Tarts work, I don't eat them."

Ed snorted in exasperation. "That's not what I meant, you ignorant…I'm sorry, I have no reason to get worked up. So how did you two meet?" 'And how did a weirdo like Rubin land a drop dead gorgeous woman?'

Danni settled back more into the chair, and Emma yawned then went back to sleep. "I met Rubin a year ago, when I became his roommate. We hit it off right away. We've been married for eight months."

Ed nodded, still unable to believe that the same weird guy that he had spent two hellish days with was actually married, and to a woman that made Ed's ex-wife look like a car on a scalper's lot. "That's…great. Any kids?"

Danni shook her head. "I can't have kids. I had…an operation when I was younger. Besides, Rubin's enough of a child." She giggled at her husband's indignant shout of protest. "Babe, I love you, but you can be childish." Rubin huffed. "Behave. Is breakfast ready yet?"

"Yeah, come and get it." Rubin slid the omelets onto plates, setting them at the table, and Ed and Danni seated themselves and dug in. Ed grinned around a mouthful of omelet. "Delicious." He set down his fork, and grinned at them. Rubin recognized the grin, and muttered "Oh shit, here we go" under his breath. "Mrs. Farr, do you mind if I ask you a few questions?" Danni made a noise of commiseration, and Ed's grin grew wider. "Are you satisfied with your complete earning potential?"

"Ecstatic."

Ed frowned, but plowed on. "Are you happy with the person you are?"

"Thrilled." The dry tone of her voice made Rubin nearly snort out his coffee. "Anything else?"

"Do you want to learn how to be rich?"

Danni snorted. "Mr. Tuttle…"

Ed grinned. "Please, call me Ed."

"Fine. Ed. My grandparents left me eight thousand dollars when they died. When my parents die, I fully expect them to leave me the family farm, which is worth about forty thousand, and fortunately the mortgage on the house and barns is paid off. I have a savings account that has three thousand dollars in it from the various jobs I've had over the years. My parents gave me another four for a wedding present. I'm hardly wallowing in poverty."

Ed couldn't speak, and Rubin guffawed. "Wow, Ed, I don't think I've ever seen you so at a loss for words. Guess Danni won't be going to that dumb seminar." Danni shot Rubin a look, and he giggled. "He pulled that same stunt on me."

Ed gaped in anger and astonishment at him. "You stole my car so you could find a place to bury your dumb cat!" Rubin bristled, and Ed wisely backed off. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that." He faced Danni. "But your husband did some really weird shit!"

Danni grinned. Rubin had told her every detail of his weird trip long ago. "I know, but that's who he is, and I wouldn't want him any other way." Rubin smirked, and Ed sighed.

"Lucky him."

Rubin nodded. "I am lucky. What about you, Ed? How are things between you and your wife?"

Ed took a bite of omelet before answering. "The divorce was finalized two months ago." Rubin shot him a look of genuine sorrow, and Ed sighed deeply. "Well, it was inevitable. We just grew apart, that's all. I couldn't be what she wanted me to be. That's life."

Rubin sighed. Ed was still in love with his ex wife, though he had no idea why. She had come across as a thoroughly grating, materialistic, and all around unpleasant woman. Granted, he had only met her for a few moments a year and a half ago, but that first impression had been less than favorable. That had also been the moment when he had truly felt sorry for Ed. He may have been a fraud and a failure, but nobody deserved the kind of treatment Rula had given him. She had acted as though he was less than worthless. "I'm sorry to hear that." Ed nodded his thanks, and the rest of breakfast was eaten in silence. "Well, I want to thank you both for a lovely meal and good conversation, but I need to hit the road. Danni, it was nice meeting you." Ed shook their hands, and then left, shaking his head at the turn Rubin's life had taken. As he drove off, he silently wished them luck.

Rubin shut the door and turned to Danni. She had a strange expression on her face, halfway between a grin and a frown. "So…that was Ed?" Rubin nodded, and Danni "hummed". "He's….nice."

Rubin giggled. "Yeah, I don't think too much of him either." His grin faded, and he frowned. "At least he stopped ogling you. I was going to stab him with a fork if he kept at it. I'm the only one allowed to ogle you."

Danni draped her arms around his neck and kissed him. "Very true. Now, what would you say to a little morning loving?"

Rubin beamed, scooped her up and carried her into the bedroom, kicking the door shut.

THE END.


End file.
